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Many Christians especially those in Africa see pastors officiating wedding ceremonies at church meetings and they they think it is a responsibility God has placed on them.
In 2003, when pastors officiated my wedding ceremony at a church meeting, I thought my wife and I as well as the pastors were fulfilling a biblical requirement and obeying God’s command. But we were ignorant.
A church wedding is often referred to as a white wedding. In most African cultures especially Ghana, it is performed on Sundays after what is called the engagement ceremony or traditional marriage ceremony, which is often held at the house of the bride on Saturdays.
Representatives of the families of both the bride and the groom often led by their heads gather for this ceremony. During the ceremony, the groom through his family presents the bride-price or dowry which is received by the bride through her family. The presentation and acceptance of the dowry is the confirmation that a marriage has mutually been contracted between the two families.
That was how most African people married before the advent of Christianity with church weddings.
Marriage ceremonies are therefore cultural than religious.
Scripturally, Adam is said to have given his rib as a bride-price to Eve when God took it and created Eve with it for him. Adam had to pay something in order to have Eve as his wife. In this case, God was the parent between them (Genesis 2:1-23).
However, as humans multiplied on the face of the earth, men began to give dowries or bride-prices consisting of money and other important items to women they sought to marry.
In Exodus 22:16, God commanded saying, “If a man seduces a virgin who is not betrothed and lies with her, he shall give the bride- price for her and make her his wife.”
From the discussions, so far, you can see that marriage is a family and cultural affair. It is not church affair and so pastors are not supposed to officiate it. Family heads must officiate it.
From the discussions, so far, you can see that marriage is a family and cultural affair. It is not church affair and so pastors are not supposed to officiate it. Family heads must officiate it.
No man of God in the history of the Bible officiated marriage or wedding ceremony. Jesus Christ attended a wedding ceremony at Cana, but He did not officiate it. He was there as a guest just like everyone else. And none of the early apostles officiated wedding ceremonies.
Truth be told that a wedding ceremony as it is done at church meetings today has nothing to with the biblical Church of Jesus Christ. It is just an importation of European culture into the Church.
Church leaders, therefore, ought to review imported cultures practices into the Church to save believers from unnecessary expenditures. Christians should limit themselves to organising traditional marriage ceremonies and use the money meant for wedding ceremonies for something relevant that will improve on the quality of their lives in future.
Church leaders, therefore, ought to review imported cultures practices into the Church to save believers from unnecessary expenditures. Christians should limit themselves to organising traditional marriage ceremonies and use the money meant for wedding ceremonies for something relevant that will improve on the quality of their lives in future.
Does it mean then that pastors and churches should have nothing to do when a member is marrying?
Pastor Peter Collins Obeng suggests that, “church leaders must be present at the ceremonies to witness it and pray for couple in keeping with Christian tradition. “
By James Quansah
